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| [circles in a tree trunk*] |
At a recent translator conference in France, I observed the reaction of
the audience of several hundred people, to a 45-minute boring lecture by a
government official telling us how great he was. Not a single person got up and
left nor did I hear a single complaint about that waste of time during the
break. This passive accepance would probably not have occurred anywhere in the Mediterranean
basin, especially in Israel, where complaining is an art form. The point is not
that either form of expression or non-expression is better but instead that the rules
of the social game differ from area to area, if not from country to country and
ethnic group to ethnic group. Furthermore, this difference affects how
visitors, immigrants and business people react to exposure to another world.
People express their feelings non-verbally and verbally. Walking out,
becoming animated or making faces all reflect an internal feeling. For example,
it is possible to understand whether or not a person agrees with the speaker by
observing the facial expression, at least in some cultures. The verbal aspect ranges
from silence, i.e., the thought never leaves the mind, to understated, as in
“he went a bit too far”, to no-doubt: “the speaker is full of shit”. All roads
lead to Rome but the road signs vary in language and scale.
While individual and family tendences clearly impact the manner of
expression, the accepted manner of society tends to control the bounds of
honesty. Admittedly, all societies impose a layer of veneer of politeness,
especially in specific settings, particularly business environments and
official occasions, but the thickness of this layers varies from country to
country. Thus, northern Europe, which
includes the dominant cultures of most of the United States and Canada, tends to be rather
stoic, hiding its dirty laundry and making every effort to maintain a serene atmosphere. In other cultures, notably most of the Mediterranean, people can keep a polite face for a while but it doesn’t take long before someone gets excited in a positive
or negative way. Few natives take these incidents to heart as drama is an
essential and integral part of life. In practice, normal behavior is what a
person expects and can interpret.
When visiting a country with a “foreign” point of view (an Italian in
Holland, not an Italian in Spain), difference makes the heart grow fonder. It
is strange but somehow charming how polite or impolite the waiters and taxi
drivers are or how simple or complicated dealing with bureaucracy becomes. The
tone of conversations at a café sounds so exotic because they are unlike the
familiar music of our familiar conversations. The body language, whether relatively
restrained or unrestrained, display a completely different if not necessarily
understood drama, adding to its charm. The foreignness of the communication,
whether verbal or not, can be part of the charm, making it exotic.
However, living in such a place is another story. To reside in the
country requires functioning in it and understanding both the text and subtext.
It may be amusing to see a driver have an angry dispute with police officer
but people used to law and order may find that “unbecoming”, bordering on
anarchistic, and clearly not beneficial to society, especially when they experience
that style of discussion with an inconsiderate neighbor. On the opposite hand,
an Israeli expecting open discussions of annoying matters could find it
frustrating that nobody speaks their mind, creating even more tension. Asymmetric
communication patterns over time either lead to a person going native or leaving the
country.
As business has become international, understanding these differences
has become vital. “One size fits all” does not apply to business communication.
A subtle reference to a Japanese or Norwegian customer may elegantly solve a controversial matter but
that same message is lost or viewed as a sign of weakness in the Middle East.
To complicate matters, every country, apart from Japan and a few others, is
multicultural today, rendering it impossible to be certain of the appropriate
tone. Still, when expressing dissatisfaction, it is important to consider the larger target culture in deciding on how direct to be. For example, “there appears to
be issue with last month’s payment” is appropriate in some places while in
others, “I have yet to receive payment” would be far more effective. When
communicating with parties abroad, make an effort to take into account how
direct the message should be.
Variety is the spice of life. It would be quite boring if all the world were
the same. The fact that people express their thoughts in different styles makes
it interesting to travel to foreign countries, comfortable to live in our
native country and complicated to communicate with businesses abroad. Thus, both to-the-point and around-the-point are relevant forms of expression.
* Picture captions help the blind fully access the Internet.
Picture from Pixibay
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